Refuse to Be Refused: Why I Went Off on the IRS (And What Happened)

Our Posse of Proprietors Book Club book for November was “Everything is Figureoutable” by Marie Forleo. It was inspiring, motivating, and incredibly impactful. The book was an expansion on the principles Marie teaches in her hilarious MarieTV show, and of course it was written with her Jersey girl wit.

Many of my life principles are based on the “everything is figureoutable” mantra, but now I had a name for this tenacity! Certain chapters were also titled with an equally powerful mantra, such as “Start Before You’re Ready,” “Progress Over Perfection,” and “Refuse the be Refused.”

The latter chapter came in super handy when I went off on the IRS yesterday, but a little back story first…

The Problem

Back in August, I rebranded to Miss MegaBug. I submitted a form to the Secretary of State to change my name, received the confirmation paperwork, and went to the bank ready to change the name on my accounts.

But I couldn’t.

Apparently I had to update the business name on my EIN, which is more of a convoluted process than it sounds. I had to mail the IRS a physical letter with my signature on it explaining the request. So I did.

Meanwhile, I couldn’t accept checks to Miss MegaBug, which was a reeeeeal annoyance seeing as I had re-branded EVERYTHING.

Here’s what transpired over the past three months:

• I called the IRS on two separate occasions for an update. The second time I was asked to re-mail the letter to different address. I sent that puppy certified.

• I went back to my bank and asked if there was any way I could accept checks to Miss MegaBug in the interim. Nope.

• I called the IRS again yesterday morning, asking for an update. The rep was super helpful and sympathetic that the request went beyond their 45 day processing period. She said that I could fax my letter, but I had to be on the phone with a rep in order to do so.

WHO FAXES ANYMORE?

• Banks do, so I called my bank’s CSR and asked if I could pop by that afternoon to fax the letter.

I knew there’d be a long wait, so I timed my call to the IRS so I would be on hold while traveling to the bank. After waiting 65 minutes, I finally got a hold of someone. I raced into the bank, letter in hand, while summarizing my situation to the rep.

Now not to be discriminatory, but my rep seemed young. I’ve spent years of my life proving that age doesn’t always denote experience, but this youthful gal seemed reeeeeally inexperienced.

Here’s what went down:

Her: “I’m sorry, but we cannot accept faxes.”

Me: “I was told by another rep that you could. I have been waiting for three months for this change to happen and I cannot accept checks to my new name until it does. “

“I’m sorry, it’s against our policy to accept faxes.”

“Is there any way we can expedite this?”

“No, I’m sorry.”

“Is there a supervisor I can talk to.”

“No, I’m sorry, we don’t have a supervisor.”

“Is there anyone else I can talk to? Can you transfer me to another rep.”

“No, I’m sorry. The agent you spoke with must have been trained wrong because there is nothing that can be done to expedite this. We have fax machines at each of our stations, but we cannot accept faxes.”

I live in a world of solutions, not problems. I also understand that kindness goes farther in getting what you want, but after going back and forth with this rep I had just had it.

By this point I had spent hours being on hold/speaking with the IRS, working with my bank, writing/sending letters, having to be sure I was clear to clients to make checks payable to my old business name, and having to chase down clients to re-write the “pay to” line when they didn’t pay attention to my note.

Pair that with the fact that the Tannery furnace was broken so I had just spent seven hours sitting in a 53-degree studio and I was DONE, operating on literal brain freeze.

Miss MegaBug became mega pissed.

I went off on that agent. I said things like “this is unacceptable,” “why do you have a fax machine that you can’t use,” “I am willing to pay a fee to expedite this,” along with my favorite “well, seeing as one agent conveyed one thing and you are reporting the opposite, I’m led to believe that your training program is inadequate and if I were to speak with someone else from your department I’d be able to find a solution.”

I said a few other things, but this chick would not budge. In my childhood experience of watching Mom fight the cable bill, I recall her calm vigilance and how she was eventually patched through to someone who could help.

Unfortunately, the IRS gives no shits about customer service, so I hung up on the rep.

At this point my energy was inflamed. I was angry crying and my entire body was shaking. Mind you, I was still in the bank and on display.

I was in an empty office at that point, so I took a few deep breaths and walked into my CSR’s office.

The Solution

After filling in the pieces the CSR couldn’t gather from hearing my end of the heated conversation, I calmly and determinately asked: “Is there anything we can do?”

She made a phone call. Her higher ups made a phone call. Questions were asked, stories repeated, and I was asked to consider applying for a new EIN. But that would mean having to open a new bank account, get a new debit card and then have to update my online auto payments, W9s, and I’d have to file two Schedule C’s on my taxes this year.

If we couldn’t find a solution, I was willing to go this route. But after months of circus acts, I really didn’t want to sign-up for another.

Finally, Queen Higher Up- head of her department and the lady who said I couldn’t change my bank account name in the first place- walked in.

She was incredibly sympathetic and said after reviewing the bank’s endorsement policy, she came up with a solution.

While my bank account name is still under Nutmeg Media, LLC (until the IRS gets their shit together), I can now accept checks to Miss MegaBug. All I have to do is write a specific note on the back of the check.

It wasn’t the solution I wanted, but it was a solution!

Takeways

• While refusing to be refused may not have worked with the IRS, I was able to go in a different direction and find a solution with my bank. Had I not been jumping through hoops for three months and had my final match with the IRS not been seen, this solution may not have come to fruition. (Remember, I had asked my bank for a solution like this months ago.)

• Even though I went off on that IRS agent, I never accused her of being incompetent (even though I totally though she was). Instead of directing my anger at her, I pointed it at the situation and her department as a whole. I also apologized at one point, saying that I was sorry she was experiencing my anger. I’m not sure if reps have to report what goes down on phone calls, but maybe my tirade will strike a conversation on their fax/no fax policy and make them realize they need more staff if processing is going beyond their already obscene 45 day period.

• I took a deep breath and grounded myself before talking with the CSR because she didn’t deserve my wrath.

• Because of my frustrating ordeal, the bank added a new entry to their endorsement policy.

This ordeal also reminded me of the other times in my life when I refused to be refused.

• I paid off a loan as Shelby and I were buying our house, which dropped my credit score 20 points. (Why is that a thing???) My score dropped one point below the bank’s requirement so we were denied our mortgage. I refused to be refused, got an exception, and we’ve been happily in our house for three years.

• When my application to graduate from college was denied, I scheduled a meeting with the provost to find out why. Turns out, she denied me because I didn’t take the required “Intro to College” class. I had more than enough credits to graduate with a bachelor’s, associate’s, and a minor and had met every other requirement. Not only that, I had transferred in with an associate’s degree and I was 19 years old!

I refused to be refused, scheduled a meeting with the president of the college, and was cleared to graduate.

• In southern New Hampshire where I grew up, you have to pass a test to be enrolled in advanced classes. I was entering middle school having already been in advanced math, but even at 12, I knew writing was my passion and destiny. When I was denied entry into the advanced English class, I wrote a letter explaining why I was passionate about writing and how I wanted to create a career around it. My mom scheduled an appointment with the department and I was admitted into the class. And I became one of the top students.

When you believe that everything is figureoutable, you’re able to make things happen despite all odds. There will always be challenges, but when you refuse to be refused, you’ll find another way.

I’d love to hear from you! When have you refuse to be refused, and what did you gain by doing so? Share your story in the comments below.

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